We've all got one: that person you dread spending time with, who seems to suck the life out of you. Some people call them energy vampires.
Your energy vampire could be a client, a friend, co-worker, an acquaintance, or a family member. You'll know an energy vampire, because you feel drained after being with them.
Energy vampires have several things in common. They're constantly complaining, everything's a drama, and they talk incessantly about themselves.
Dr Judith Orloff, author of Positive Energy, identifies five types of energy vampires:
- The Sob Sister – The most common type of energy stealer. Every time you talk to this person, they’re whining. Sob sisters love a captive audience, and are more interested in complaining than solutions.
- The Drama Queen – Male or female, the Drama Queen has a knack for exaggerating small incidents into off-the-chart dramas.
- The Constant Talker – They’ve mastered the art of circular breathing, and could talk under wet cement. The Constant Talker has no interested in other people’s feelings or opinions, so good luck getting a word in.
- The Blamer – This is the kind of person who has a sneaky way of making you feel guilty for not getting things absolutely perfect.
- Go For The Jugular Fiend – They’re spiteful and vindictive, and cut you down with no consideration for your feelings. Somehow they make this seem like a virtue, because they’re “just being honest”.
Do you recognise someone you know in this list?
Especially at this time of the year, when we're counting down to Christmas, and when our own tolerance and patience is starting to wear thin, energy vampires are even more taxing than usual.
In a proposals environment, energy is hard to come by, and we can’t afford to waste it.
It's not like a presentation, where you’re on your feet and you can rely on adrenaline, nervous energy and the buzz of the room to keep you going.
December is a busy time for pitches and proposals, so be kind to yourself, and to each other.
It’s tough enough to create the energy and excitement that will help you win, without stealing it from others.